Hello friends. By the title of this post, I'm sure you lovely people may have realized that I got dumped. It happened a week ago and tonight was finally when my breakdown happened. This topic might seem negative right now, but I promise it will get better. So whether you're dealing with a breakup, you're scared to get into a relationship, or you have a friend who is dealing with a breakup, please keep reading.
I thoroughly believed Grant was the most amazing guy I have ever met. Seriously! We were comfortable, we understood each other, and we genuinely liked each other. We have been dating since November 12, 2014--so, over a good three months. He was all I really thought about. He was who made me excited for school. He was my best friend. Now, I don't want to scare anyone from me using the word, "was," but we did just break up. Re-mending the friendship will take time. I am not saying you should not date your friends. You never know what may happen! Do NOT be afraid to take risks, people. He did try to break up with me once before, but asked for me back. Trusting my heart, I agreed. For some reason my heart really desperately needed him. So I went with it. The worst that could have happened was if he would break up with me again, but I would be able to learn from it! And I did. I do not regret re-dating him. Having been dumped, I feel small. I feel powerless. I feel unwanted. You or someone you may know might understand this feeling. Listen: it's normal. My good friend Adam immediately came to my rescue, offering me his Grace Helbig book, a sticky note marking the 'breakups' section. Reading it, I began to feel a glimpse of emotional control. Grace's words honestly made me feel less alone. Everyone gets dumped sometime in their lives.
Tonight, like I said, I finally broke down. I finally felt truly alone. But I wasn't. I texted my friend Adam about how I was feeling. His words turn my sorrows into tears of joy. This tragedy is bringing me closer to my friends. There is a positive in the negative. Here are the messages (and, yes, I know it's a bit personal...but I feel it will truly help):
From Me: "Breaking news-I am finally reacting to being dumped. It finally hit me." "I can't stop thinking about everything." From Adam: "[Goodness], I know the feeling. I usually cry / sleep until it passes. If you feel vulnerable at school, we'll totally understand. And someone brave can remove him from your regal presence at lunch. Whatever makes you feel better. If you need to just talk, I'm always here for you." From Me: "I wouldn't want someone to remove him. I don't know..." "I've never been that close with someone before so I'm devastated when I think of [the] fact that he has no interest in me. It makes me feel small." "And I'm not wanting to ask much of you guys. Just please try to keep my mind off of it and please try to keep me happy. I'm thankful that you are listening and letting me talk about this." From Adam: "To me, that's always been the scariest thing about relationships--opening up to someone with the possibility of someday being rejected. And now you've actually gone through that. And now, even though you may feel small, you're ten times bigger than you were before. I think as long as you learned something, as long as you genuinely enjoyed it, this counts as a win for you. And if he can't 'handle' you being you, that's his problem. Because I promise you that there are so many more people who can. Who would love to. And they're so much better than him, to boot. Like Connor Franta, only straight." "And you mean more than the world to us. That's why we care so much." "Take time to feel things. A healthy amount of feeling will do you wonders."
Thank you guys so much for reading. I hope you found this helpful and uplifting. I have learned so much from this experience, and this negative situation is bringing a positive impact--I am bettering my relationship with my other friends. If you have been dumped, lean on your friends for support. If you know someone who has been dumped, offer support. If you are afraid of love, don't be. A quote I saw on Pinterest read, "To love is to risk. Therefore, to love is to be brave." It will always be a risk, but I promise, no matter what, something amazing will come out of it. If you do not have any close friends, feel free to message me! I would be glad to listen to you and try to help you feel better. Thanks again for reading, leave a request below, and DON'T FORGET TO FEEL! <3