Exploration in Self Love (Pt. IV)

Hello friends!
​2019 is here! Whaaaaaa???

  In my last post I briefly discussed my goals for the new year. This week, I'm already implementing the changes I need to succeed.

   To recap, these were the goals I had in mind:

   - to try to find happiness everyday, even in something small
   - to not sweat the small stuff
   - to learn to appreciate the good in myself that I struggle to see today
   - to keep those close to me even closer
   - to make more one-on-one time with family
   - to continue to be honest on this blog
  - to better my relationship with myself before I choose to get into a relationship with someone else...which also requires repair in my trust with others after said long-term relationship.


   So what have I been doing already? Well, I'll tell you...
​

I've been trying to create more artwork

   Creating different types of art has been giving me time to unwind and to let my mind go wherever it wants. Even if I think about hard times, when I'm painting, nothing seems to get under my skin. This is why I have so much fun doing crafts with others--because there are good vibes going all around! On the first of January, I went to Hobby Lobby with my friend Shelby and we spent hours painting any old thing that came to mind. I'm not sure if we were just slap happy from our lack of sleep, but we conquered a lot of artwork. And we giggled and talked along the way! Creating things with other people is perfect for bonding and feeling proud of yourself for creating something that only exists in your own mind.

Spending time with new people

   Something I challenge myself to do is to get out more, and to spend time with new people. Recently, I visited the Catfe with a school friend named Jess. In general, I'd love to go to more of the catfe's events and spend more time with the kitties, especially because the proceeds at the catfe go towards helping the cats. But even just going to new places in downtown Dayton makes me feel happy. And talking about classes, cats, and all things between was so much fun. I love surrounding myself with more positive people and critters! Here are some photos of the cats to make you feel all the happiness I've been feeling lately:

   Also, how cute is Snooblet? How has he not been adopted???

And lastly, I've been journaling regularly.

   But not an ordinary  journal. I feel like those are more intimidating to commit to. However, I've been filling out a bullet journal page every night before bed. I know it's not the traditional way to bullet journal, but I like making my own unique page for every day where I can discuss the happenings of the day and reflect on the little moments that made me smile that day.

   Usually this is more of a nightly routine where I can turn on The Office and unwind. It's super therapeutic!

   The pages are imperfect, but they're crucial for me to feel at peace and to not fret about searching for one singular definition of happiness. In one of my previous blog posts, I discussed the fact that I realized that happiness is not one single destination in life. You don't go on a journey to find one point in life that is happiness. No. Actually, you find happiness in life's daily moments, big or small. Even just a conversation with a stranger or giggling at your roommate's cat. I've been feeling less discouraged by experiencing a little anxiety or a little stress from school or work because I know that at the end of the day, there were still positive moments. I know that my family is healthy, that I've made incredible new friends, and that I can always count on myself to cope with any negative moment that comes my way.

   I finally feel at peace with being single. I don't feel dependent anymore. Would it be nice to have that special someone to spend time with? Absolutely. But I'm in full control of my life right now. I don't have anyone else to influence my decisions, I don't have to stress about making the time. I'm busy with life as it is, with my final semester. And I'm enjoying having "me time".

   Counting my blessings has also shown me that it's an absolute waste of time and energy to be mad at someone. Holding grudges and sulking helps nothing. It's just taking up the time in your day to do something that makes you happy. It's ruining the positive relationships that you have around you. Communication is key, communication helps you understand people. It can help solve so many problems (Unrelated, I think it's also a waste of time to not tell your crush you like them. I understand a fear of rejection, but there should be pride in your courage and in knowing their mindset. Once again, communication shouldn't be so scary...actually, it's wonderful.).

Anyways, that was my little unexpected rant there at the end. How's your 2019 so far?

Keep on grinning!

Lydia