Little One

Ace,
I've been afraid to write this.
Maybe it's because it'd mean I'm accepting that you're gone. But part of me doesn't want to believe it. I'm also afraid that I won't say everything right. But you've been such a special guy.

   Mom and Pops haven't seen you in a while. And I know I've been out of the house for almost a year, by now. But even when I'd come to visit, you always knew.

​   You'd hear my car and meet me at the top of the hill. You'd lead the way into the garage, but then plop on the ground before you reached the doorstep, being oh, so discrete that you wanted some rubbins. Then you'd follow me the rest of the way in, unless I'd just carry you in, myself.

   You've always been my partner in crime.

   We first met when I was ten years old, practicing soccer in the back yard. And then you just approached us from the field. You were always so friendly. Gosh, I don't even know which tense to use. You could still be out there somewhere. But it's just out of character for you to not come home for this long. I really do hope you find your way home, my love.

   You're one of a kind.

  Literally the coolest cat I've ever encountered. I designed a brand after you for my design portfolio! When my professor asked me how I'd describe you (to establish the style of my logo), I told her, "Cool. That's the only way I can describe him. He's simply the coolest cat."

   And honestly, knowing that you might not come home, I feel empty. You've been such a big part of my life. You've been my best friend growing up. You've always been home to cuddle up when I had a bad day, or even just because you're so cute that you need some pets.

   Through my anxieties and dramatic teenage/early adulthood mishaps, you've been the consistent factor of calm in my life. I knew you were always just as excited to see me as I was to see you. You were always so social and responsive to me when I'd be looking for you outside.

   Such a smart guy.

   You also made a few blog debuts here and there. You always sprawled on my bed whenever you decided to come into my room. But you were never bothered by my photo-taking and makeup-doing. You would nap, then wake up for a bit to see the happenings of G&N, behind the scenes.

   Little one, you're always on the move. And I hope that this means you might make it back home one day. But if not, just know that I thank you. Thank you for being an amazing companion.

​   You've been such a sweet and innocent friend. You've ventured inside and outside the house. You're gentle, but strong. You've taught me so much, and have given me so much hope.

If you're still out there, please come home.

​You're brave. You're an inspiration. And you'll never be forgotten.

I love you, bud. You'll always be in my heart.